yeap. I'm leaving. Sort of. I'll elaborate.

On a deeper, more insightful level, deviantART has become unsatisfying, it has become more of a weight that enforces to me sink inspiration rather than surface it. It's also become a drag. I mean, what is this, anyway? Real exposure or just throwing out what you've created with heart, soul, meaning, for the public to view, comment, fave and ignore as if it's something of less value than any material possessions. These bunch of lines and colours and compositions and shapes and nonsense took up space and time and breath and thought and emotion and LIFE, they mean absolutely everything to me personally and nothing to such a hugely unappreciative audience [unappreciative because it's huge therefore being too general and popularity-centred]. Not to say that I dislike deviantART. I may have taken down my gallery but that doesn't mean I'm LEAVING dA altogether, no. I've met some interesting people I learn to love corresponding with and I enjoy giving my own input on other's artworks as at least some of them are grateful enough to return the favour or show the gratitutde [although obviously not a lot of people are up for this] plus I've forced a couple of people to join it would seem really redundant for me being the first among us to leave this, bleh.

I'm not thoroughly leaving dA. But I have grown out of it, but this is an opportunity to expand my experimental side. I'll obviously be creating artwork but I guess I won't be displaying them to the general public, this large community, which, even though is art-based, has become a sort of conformity due to its focus on popularity [oh bleh! good art needs no popularity, it needs concept, meaning, essence, skills and technique and originality] which is why I've lost my previously present [almost]passion for this community and what it has to offer[or what it seems to offer]. Plus I need feedback that means more to me than temporary adoration, and I have friends who can give honest critical or insightful musings on my artwork and I ABSOLUTELY them for it, and I realize I should appreciate them more than I should appreciate a buncha.. 'zeros and ones on my computer screen.'

Plus, to drag my personal life into this at the moment, I'm sorta going through a transition, the whole finding-out-who-I-am, or more like just becoming the Who I Want To Be as opposed to Who I Am or Who I've Been. And I'm changing in my ways of approaching this whole ArtToThePublic thing. Dude I basically don't like dA anymore. And don't need it, being dependant on THIS has gotten me absolutely nowhere and I'm at that point where I want to flipping get somewhere.

I've thought long and hard about this and this is the right choice for me, it's the best too. From now on, I'll be posting experimental works; poetry, maybe? photography, definitely. sketches, possibly. Comics, no, cuz you're never gonna understand it unless you can relate to it or live in close proximity with me.

So, I'm BACK. and I'm gone in a sense. Still here, bleh, still alive, bleh, still well [well getting there], bleh, and still ruining innocence, wee. So how have y'all been for those of who actually flipping care.

[and oh yeah, for the clubs I've joined, ya wanna delete me due to inactivity and not putting up yer links on my journals/siggy, be my guest, i won't be going all enthusiastically joining groups any time soon]